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Exclusive !!
Yes folks, we’ve succeeded where many other lesser
publications have failed, by getting hold of the hottest love letters to have been stolen
from someone’s shoebox under their bed this century. No expense was spared, no stone
went uncovered, nothing got in our way (get on with it!! Ed.). So here they are, the Simon
and Nicky love letters.
- Chien Blvd
- Northampton
- England
2/8/91
Dear Nicky,
Hi. Remember me, Simon? We met in Minehead last
week. I was with some of my mates on a cricket tour of Somerset. I was the one who stoked
your breasts before introducing myself. |
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- Haggis Street
- Jock Strap
- Scotland
- 5 August ’91
Dear Simon,
Sod off!!!!
Yours sincerely,
Nicky |
| Since we met, I’ve done
nothing but think of you. Yesterday, I bought a set of tartan Y-fronts, and came in them
as soon as I’d put them on!! When I got
home from tour, I read all about Scotland in my big picture encyclopaedia which I keep on
my bedside table. I now know a lot more about the Scots, and you can rest assured that I
will always think of you every time I hear ‘Danny boy’ sang at the pub.
Please write soon, love & kisses
Simon |
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